I lunged after it. I tried to sound cheerful.. Hardened knights.

He took a look at his assailants
He took a look at his assailants..Arrows and stones and burning pitch rained down on us from all directions.All at once. women.The trail seemed cut out of the mountain's edge. I leaped on him before he had a chance to recover. though our new enemy became the blistering heat and thirst.I pushed Robert through the smoke and dust in the direction of our ranks. Or another Alo. most of all. resolved that any breath might be my last. I said.. I scanned the walls. It is blasphemy.The longer Antioch survived.Young Robert. then he nodded. wandering among burning buildings. her brave smile as I hopped down the road.I will help the miller increase his tax by a third.We had marched across Europe and through the Alps.

The despicable knight laughed at our priest.. Oh. Norcross pressed on.The Bosporus .. In front of us. to break the mood.My throat went dry. You don't look like much of a Crusader.. Do not forget your pledge. I lunged.. Narrow passes. toward the mill. It is pledged and honor bound tohim.The siege took months. Children Wailed for their mothers before being hurled into raging flames like kindling. but never had I seen a place like this! Gold was like tin here. I wanted not just to fight for my own gain. From that moment on. for Robert's sake.

a human soul.Their presence here could only signal harm. His face was still lit with that innocent grin. And. I am sure. her yellow hair pinned up for the workday under a white cap. Here. From behind the mill's door came the sickening cries of Aim?e. two miles..I won't..It's an army. Paul the carter told me. This time. but they were clear and sure. even before the sun. Its frightened eyes showed that the animal was aware of the danger.Under the shield of darkness. It almost seemed funny to me: this. this one bare chested and monstrous. He steps up and rings the bell. their chargers useless.

His mouth curved into a sheepish grin. They raised me as one of their own.Tafur.Then my mind fixed on the danger of the moment. She stood there. but as we got closer. My blood was surging. you will need it all the more. the hooting ceased.. I ran him through again as he fell. amused. I laughed above the din. I couldn't hold back the truth from her.All along we were told that Peter's army was months ahead of us. I could see in Sophie's eyes that she felt it too. Robert called out. I remarked to Robert. and honor in battle.I lunged for the harness around its neck. People will be eager to feed a Crusader. he winked at his men. his goose comically trailing behind.

for those who put aside their earthly possessions and join our Crusade.Then all at once a chilling roar rose up from behind the city walls. uncared for. surely the coming battles could test us no more than what we had already faced. lashed Alo to the staves of the mill's large wheel. I held my shield as they ripped into us.Heaven's army.Never mind. Men simply dropped as they marched. I had lashed myself to a goat and placed my trust in its measured step to pull me farther on. Cries of Death to the pagans andDei leveult . the rest were seized. was swept screaming into vast crevices or dropped in his tracks by Serb or Magyar arrows a thousand miles before the first sign of a Turk. I had to see Sophie again. That is the blood of your useless Savior. Every next man clutching at his limbs and throat. their skin dark with blood and filth.She had nearly drifted off to sleep.We will.I just laughed. Please. you'll have your pick. Nothing ever happened here!I was struck with a kind of wonderment.

I didn't remember my father. Are you taking notes?The raucous laughter continued for a time as we waited for the knight to emerge. gaining hold. I heard thewhoosh from a wave of arrows shooting across the sky. I finally prayed. I finally staggered up the steep stone steps in a fit of rage. And holy relics worth more than a thousand inns like ours.. and I always did. then pointed east. I put the priest's staff to the ground and took a step-the other way. they were split open by the Turks as they swooped by.Along the way. You are free!EVEN IN VEILLE DU PERE.Let us go. word had reached us of the Pope's call. were each manned with archers. I reached for the priest's wooden staff. I couldn't hold back the truth from her. `Now. she said. It was not me. horrified.

freedom. Every next man clutching at his limbs and throat.. I begged. I stepped forward.As we entered the town there were corpses everywhere. I felt her thin body tremble in my arms. the small group of men Robert and I had attached ourselves to began to thin.Go where ? There was something in his face. pagan towns now consecrated in the name of God. spilling over with defenders in white robes and bright blue turbans at every post. one mind. I said. the small group of men Robert and I had attached ourselves to began to thin. It almost seemed funny to me: this. When Alo broke the surface.Ibn Kan.Off in the distance the gray outline of hills narrowed to a sliver of shining blue.. Then he sneered. tumbling.So. They threw both into the middle of the square.

he shouted back. a bit reluctantly. I lunged toward him. It is pledged and honor bound tohim. men and women; some carrying axes and mallets and old swords. Today. but each step. torsos naked and disemboweled. New aromas entranced me.A knight pushed up the trail.Choking back the laughter. we fitted the comb's halves together and made a whole.I won't. humor. lofting some harmless arrows at us. how I had since the first time I had set eyes on her. All the cattle and oxen had been butchered; even the dogs had been eaten. `Good enough. fixed on my shock of bright red hair. and to my horror spotted two large Turks preparing to tip a vat of bubbling tar upon those manning the ram.I threw my pouch over my shoulder and tried to drink in the last sight of her beautiful.. piercing the Turk with my sword.

She was pounced on by two marauding Tafurs who tore the clothes from her body and took turns mounting her in the street.. This is Veille du P?re?It must be. No one had ever seen anything like it before. Very old. One day. House of Prostitution..Norcross shouted.Sir. I went on.tonight !Tonight. the Pope's protection is worthless.Somehow they knew. every twitch of her nose. more Tafurs hunting for spoils. He would give up the city. I saw men clearly over the edge guzzle their own urine as if it were ale. to Toulouse.I am finally free. Now that was just a mocking refrain in my dreams. from the same building. I stepped forward.

Jerusalem is near. It bounced off with the effect of a pebble tossed against a wall. No one wanted to delay in our rush to catch up with the army of Peter.The giant man hesitated. But every time a soldier moaned.If it's martyrs you're looking for. dead.. I stayed. someone commented. He is drowned. But then he was overwhelmed. a sudden rock slide.We spotted red crosses painted everywhere. Sophie.The lead vermin ran the blade of his sword across my chest. I urged the Turk.Off in the distance the gray outline of hills narrowed to a sliver of shining blue. I'll be back before you know it. then attend harder to your work. Norcross gathered his knights. Or freeing Jerusalem..

It almost seemed funny to me: this..Let us go. confused. I no longer knew what was inside of me. her shy blue eyes unable to hide from mine. a new hell awaited. eager not to miss out on the loot. House of Prostitution.She took it.I looked at the fallen Turk and whispered good-bye. The Turks fled like rabbits. which dipped deep beneath the surface of the river. bakers.Outside Civetot we had our first taste of the enemy..I looked into his hooded eyes. Yet all I could do was laugh. ? I repeated.Would she even know me now.. The talk. Each town we got to was scorched and empty.

grinning. wildly gasping for air.In battle. Wave after wave of frontal attacks only increased the death toll.I'm strong. She had a song for me.WE CAME TO A HIGH RIDGE overlooking a vast bone-white plain and there it was. maids.You probably thought you were ridding the world of a complete madman. I fear not. Food was down to nothing. The man staggered. were spared just so we could bear the tale.I started toward the road. I raised myself to my elbows. The Pope's protection. I held my shield as they ripped into us..Then I knelt beside Robert. nonsense. you say. Robert turned to me.Looking up.

You're not going to believe this. realizing how close we had come to death. and the head of a man next to me shot off like a kicked ball. The conquering throng had gone deeper into Antioch. Whoa. ? The Turk seemed to sigh. I swiped a sunflower and went up to her. screaming.I was going to die. slowly depleting. Or freeing Jerusalem. slaughtered Christian and infidel alike. With a hideous bray.The troops along the riverbank burst into laughter. He exhaled a final breath. I tried to joke. but for him it was never far. if my lord wants. the column came to a halt. Food was down to nothing.. One was Nicodemus. We're going in.

We looked at each other for a long while. was of treasure and glory. No one around can do the tricks I do.He grinned sheepishly.It was a scabbard. then he nodded. It was all that kept him from plunging to his death. With untold treasure and fame. Foot soldiers were hurling their lances up at the defenders.I wanted to take something from the church with me. It was only luck to avoid death at any point.At intervals. There was nothing more to say. mad with greed. `We'll be in Jerusalem by summer. Sophie. For what end?Why did you spare me? I looked into the Turk's dull. It carries your food for the next two weeks. these Tafurs fought like possessed devils. but my legs seemed rooted to the ground. I held her and stroked her hair.I will come! I will take the Cross. it caused a terrible reaction.

It seemed impregnable. his invitation almost irresistible.But as I held Sophie that night. no god either.Frantic shouts rang out..How could I leave her? How could I be such a fool?You'll come back. would she kiss my bright red hair now that it was filled with gore and lice?My queen.' it reads. spinning around a final time to catch her laugh.OUR POWERLESSNESS WAS SO OBVIOUS it was shameful to me. Then. Tonight you'll go to sleep fucking the emir's wife!The camp sprang alive. lifeless. It was a host of lies. the stubborn Bohemond among them. I wanted to say. What else could matter? I was a fool to have left her. actually.. Sophie. Paul the carter told me.Thanks.

I will come!I saw Matt.Carrot-top here must be keen on the miller. a hazel twig to clean my teeth.I felt a hole in the pit of my stomach.It took everything I had not to leap on the Tafurs myself. I had made two lasting friends.For freedom? Suddenly. A few straggly horsemen. a grim odor pressed at my nostrils. women. It was as if the boy had seen that he was powerless to stop his own death and..THE MORNING OF THE DAY I was to leave was bright and clear.' Now his curiosity is piqued. anything that came into my head-when one of the henchmen rushed up to me.I've heard from the Spaniard there are Christians chained to the city's walls.Suddenly I heard a rumble from above. literally roasting in their armor. This is Veille du P?re?It must be. I squinted through the trees and felt my jaw drop. the Holy Land. Turk warriors made forays outside the city walls. They threw both into the middle of the square.

masons.' Now his curiosity is piqued. stepping over to the boy. Today. I muttered Sophie's name as if in prayer. He steps up and rings the bell. It is blasphemy. Not from its walls crumbling but from treachery and greed.In that instant I saw my helplessness.A maiden met a wandering man. Robert seemed assured.Suddenly I heard a rumble from above. dropping them as they ran. you lazy louts. Whatever I had come for-freedom. She hurried to the table by the hearth. mad with greed. then attend harder to your work. The smallest hope flashed through me: maybe I could whack it across his ankles. She came back a moment later with her treasured comb. Norcross pressed on. unprotected-chopped to bits in their tents.THE MORNING OF THE DAY I was to leave was bright and clear.

A sea of white tunics and red crosses.I stopped her. why. Or another Alo.. sucking the air out of my belly. I remarked to Robert. suddenly. poured into heaps of dung like spoiled wine.now . covered in filth and sores. I tried to pivot around Robert.I am finally free.. but they fell against the massive walls like harmless sticks. brandishing a makeshift knife. I was sure.at me. and who can blame him? We've marched a long way. hung up on spears. masons. we'renear . you say.

even before the sun. unsure look.We had marched across Europe and through the Alps.Every instant. most of all. or that I was thinking of her at the end. Fresh-faced and chattering. How could all those faces-all that hope-be gone?Veille du P?re. Then she ran away. not Jerusalem. had to be dragged single file up the steep way.We made our way helter-skelter through the city. Women.We focused on the eastern wall. I was trembling with horror. At ten!I had spent my youth traveling with a band of itinerant goliards. I thought we would live out our lives together. I muttered. Paul the carter told me. the same arrogant bastard who'd mocked Nico after his death. Each year I promised I would come back. was a million miles away. So did my urge to resist.

somewhere in MacedoniaThe heavy-bearded knight reared his mount over us on the steep ridge. slowly depleting. Jagged mountains appeared in our path. I thought we would live out our lives together. Mouse called to me.Mocking us was more like it. it's the worst equipped. Then we held until close to dawn. Infidels. Guillaume's mount seemed to stumble. and outlaws hoisting their sacks and makeshift weapons.Where are these nuns whenI am in need? a soldier behind me moaned.I stopped her. Professor. they urged. The detachment at Xerigordon had already been done in-not by siege butthirst. If you don't. you will need it all the more. my sword flew out of my hands. spilling blood. word reached us that the fortress had fallen.. he boasted.

I sang in the quietest voice before I slept each night.Be brave . Robert seemed assured. don't let this be some kind of cruel trick. I felt I had shamed myself.I had to get out of here. In any case. We had heard that masses of men were leaving their families. just that I could no longer fight in their ranks. which was starting to fill up.' Now his curiosity is piqued.. piercing the Turk with my sword. my love. softly moaning with pleasure and love. clutching at their heads and throats. Raymond and Bohemond.. Maybe I'll come back a knight.Heaven's army.Suddenly. will you? In a flash. He jerked his charger down the steep bank to the river and led the mount in.

you princesses. I protested.The arid lands of our Lord's great sacrifice have been defiled by the infidel Turk. think of how our lives could change. God. instead of turning to face his attacker.Whatkind of God inspired such horror? Was this God's fault? Or man's?Something snapped in me. You'd better go. I stepped over to the body of the man who had spared me and looked. I tried to joke. mock waving.I saw disaster looming. we were told. It is your lord.The traveler assumes it is a joke. transfixed by the awful corpses of the Turks. were each manned with archers. My blood was surging. I will be back.Norcross seemed delighted. You're not going to believe this. My eyes locked helplessly on him as he stumbled in his long robe. In any case.

I waited for the death blow. torsos naked and disemboweled. who had sneaked into our ranks one day as we passed through Apt. We pulled back two miles.What did flash through my brain was the incredible irony of it all.You may have started the day still a boy. but by its end you'll be a man. I was only a breath away from death and yet instead of panic and fear. ? I repeated. rumors reached us of Christians inside the city being tortured and raped. my fear left me. Get ready. he lowered the wheel again. I saw a cross. Churches have been burned and looted. Turbaned men rushed into the street and were cut down in bloody messes before they could even raise their swords. was next to me in line. and from within. and even more than that. I lunged after it. I tried to sound cheerful.. Hardened knights.